Greetings from the past!

I'm not actually here right now – as you read these words I'm far away from my laptop eschewing all copywriting for some much-needed holiday time!

But I can't let a month go by without touching base with you guys, can I? So I'm writing this in advance to say 'Hi' while I sun myself (weather permitting) outside a hotel somewhere...

As a result of my time off, I'm afraid I don't have a new release to furnish you with this month but I DO have a freebie – which I know you all like.

I'm also sharing the very start of my forthcoming 'romantasy' epic. The first book is still a long way from being ready - and I've decided to work on some shorter standalone releases while I slowly beaver away at it – but hopefully, the short excerpt will whet the appetite!

Scroll down past the sultry siren sunbathing on the sand sans swimwear for all the deets...

FREE FOR A SHORT WHILE:

Give the first Sexhibition a try!

THIS IS A LIMITED-TIME OFFER

So if you want to read it for free, grab it while you can!

And if you enjoy the first part then rest assured that things only get wilder and more explicit from there. So check out either the other books individually or get all 5 for a knockdown price!

Dungeon Master

As you may or may not know, Amazon has strict (and not particularly transparent) rules regarding what you're allowed to show on erotica covers and how explicit the blurb is (and even the keywords, I believe).

Fall foul of these rules and your book enters 'the dungeon' meaning it leaves certain lists and won't appear in general search results - you have to actively seek it out to purchase it.

Well, several of my books have fallen foul of this accursed algorithm, and I've not always been able to rectify the issue - often because I have no idea which rule has been broken!

So this month I'm featuring all the titles that are officially in Amazon's dungeon - meaning they may not have been on your radar unless you have been scouring my author page.

From $2.99/£2.49 or FREE with Kindle Unlimited (if Amazon)

Magic, sex and adventure!!

Here's a quick preview of my in-progress romantasy epic!

I'm loathe to give too much away but here's the start of the first chapter to give you a flavour of what's in store:

Jacqui Palmer waved the marker pen over the whiteboard leaving her trademark near-illegible scrawl. It was always a source of great amusement to the faculty staff at the university in which she lectured that their prized linguist and language guru could have such appalling handwriting. A woman famed for her communication skills, a woman who could unravel meaning with the bare minimum written context, a woman who could comprehend an entire language given just a few pages of text; yet give her a pen and she would scrawl like a five-year-old, leaving the bemused reader with the impression she was trying to communicate via an old archaic script.

It had become the Head of English’s favourite example when attempting to explain ‘irony’ to his students.

The members of Jacqui’s class breathed a collected sigh of relief as she translated her scribbles with an enthusiastic proclamation:

“Dr Theophrastus Bombastus von Hohenheim. Better known as ‘Paracelsus’, the Latin title he adopted in the early sixteenth century. And with a birth name like that you can hardly blame him, can you?”

A generous ripple of laughter broke the reverential silence. It wasn’t that funny, but the students liked her and wanted to show their approval. Professor Palmer was a popular teacher; she was young, good-natured and self-deprecating – and as much as the students respected her, they treated her more like a peer than an authority figure.

She fancied herself as a rock ‘n’ roll intellectual; a maverick in a field of stuffy academics, and her popularity with the new generation fed into this image. She was the female Dr Malcolm from Jurassic Park or Professor Brian Cox from… well, real life. England somewhere, wasn’t it? She knew full well that the overwhelming sign-up for a voluntary class as niche as History of Alchemy was due more to the teacher than the topic.

It didn’t hurt that she was also rather attractive – certainly compared to any other professor at the college (or indeed one that she had ever met). Early thirties with long wavy flame-red hair and a freckled face that had earned her compliments comparing her to a young Nicole Kidman.

This wasn’t lost on Jacqui, who absolutely loved being the students’ favourite and was happy to flaunt her feminine wares to earn the approval of anyone who was less impressed by her intellectual credentials.

“Interesting fact, ladies and gentlemen: our word bombastic derives from his outspoken and vibrant attacks on the establishment of the time.”

Jacqui shot a friendly glance towards a fresh-faced jock sitting nearest to her but couldn’t gauge whether he was more impressed with her fascinating piece of trivia or her ass, which was flatteringly presented by her tight skinny jeans and had commanded his attention for the vast majority of her presentation.

She didn’t mind. She loved being the students’ favourite, after all…

“You see Paracelsus had his own ideas about the world – and they did not fit particularly well with the authorities’ view of the cosmos. Now understand that this man was – for all intents and purposes – a scientist. He was a military surgeon and a physician but his education was rooted in alchemy and natural magic. He was tutored by the Abbott of Sponheim no less, who I spoke about a couple of weeks back. The principles he learned from his teacher, consolidated by his individual theories; caused Paracelsus to theorise that nature was something more mystical than rational... Something not bound by laws but by something magical, incomprehensible to human minds. He believed in God but didn’t believe God created everything; more that God provided the lumen naturae – the light of nature – from which all life sprang.”

Jacqui glanced at her watch.

“Which is in itself a whole new philosophy that we’ll get into next term.”

That was the cue for the class to noisily gather their things and hastily prepare themselves for life outside the classroom. Jacqui had to speak loudly to be heard over the sudden activity.

“Remember, there’s a lot more detail on my website – and my book, of course. Have a great spring break, see you guys soon…”

Jacqui’s voice dropped in volume, as she realised no one was paying the least bit of attention to her – let alone listening to her – in their mad rush to get out the door. She talked to herself sarcastically,

“Hey, you too Professor Palmer, thanks for a great term, I’ve learned so much…”

Her gentle tirade was interrupted by a familiar face with a music magazine in one hand and a book in the other. Jacqui didn’t recognise the mag’s cover star – she was very much of the opinion that popular music peaked in the 90s and was indifferent to current musical trends – but the book certainly rang a bell. She had spent three years of her life writing it after all, and a prolonged presence in the popular science top 10 allowed her to afford the kind of over-priced designer jeans that she was currently modelling.

“Thanks for a great term, Professor, I’ve learned so much,” he said, suggesting he had overheard Jacqui’s moan.

“Thank you, Pedro, I’m glad you enjoyed it. And please, call me Jacqui.”

First-name terms seemed appropriate given he had performed oral sex on her earlier in the term. He had complained about a low grade in one of her other classes – ancient languages, which is where her main expertise lay – and Jacqui had been sympathetic given it was a borderline fail. When he had asked if there was anything he could do to get it re-appraised, all Jacqui could think about was his muscular body and a period of sexual abstinence brought about by overworking and under-dating. She casually suggested a fumble in the AV side room and he seemed game. Truth be told, it wasn’t the first time she had got inappropriately intimate with a student – the inevitable consequence of having a high sex drive and being surrounded by so many handsome young men (and women!).

“You think you could sign a copy for me?”

He offered the book to its author but Jacqui was suspicious as she gave her autograph: he had countless opportunities to ask for this in the past and since their previous engagement, this was the first time he had spoken with her one-to-one like this.

“Is this welcome bit of flattery anything to do with the grade I gave you for your most recent assignment?”

“It brings my average down,” he smiled, not the least bit embarrassed that his ruse had been so transparent. “Thought you might… reconsider?”

“So, this is to butter me up, is it?” she said waving the book in front of him.

“No, not at all! I love your book. ‘Modern Magic’… utterly dope, man.”

“Pedro, I re-marked your paper last time because it was a borderline grade but that last effort? It was a stinker.”

“I thought you re-marked my paper last time because I went down on you?”

She sighed and rolled her eyes but was secretly amused by his directness and candour. She looked around to make sure there was no one else in the lecture hall before responding.

“You offering seconds?”

“Will you re-mark my paper?”

“It’s not going to get above a ‘C’.”

“Won’t that depend on how good I am?”

Jacqui sighed again, trying to exude an air of indifference. But the fact was she would welcome the excitement of an eager young man doing his level best to sexually satisfy her with his mouth.

“This way,” she instructed, striding towards the AV room with a beckoning finger.

As much as she tried to maintain the impression that she was in control, his smug grin as he closed the door behind him suggested that he knew he had her wrapped around his finger.

Jacqui unbuttoned her tight jeans and peeled them off to reveal her long, slender legs before motioning with her hand for Pedro to take reciprocating action.

“Come on. Let me see those big muscles of yours.”

He took off his tight T-shirt and flexed his gym-toned torso, giving Jacqui the pleasure of taking in his chiselled form before he went to work.

“Can I see your tits this time?” he cheekily requested.

“No,” she curtly replied, pulling down her panties so that she was completely naked from the waist down. “Now hurry up, I’ve got places to be.”

She propped herself up against a low set of shelves filled with projectors and cables – exactly as she had the last time they had found themselves in this situation – and parted her thighs slightly, sending some fingers down south to part her labia and let some air get to her moist folds.

Pedro approached with a lurid smile on his face, perhaps noting the sticky sounds that Jacqui had produced upon touching her engorged pussy. He reached around and held her bare buttocks, squeezing them gently as she caressed his firm pecs.

“Just a quick look,” he said, staring down the gap in her shirt at the black lace underneath. “Then I’ll go straight down.”

Let's end things there... Hopefully, you get a sense of what I'm aiming for with this one: a little more plot-heavy than some of my other efforts but with plenty of sex sprinkled throughout. Uncanny Ecstasy is a good comparison! I hope to be able to share the first book in what I suspect will be quite an epic series soon... Stay subscribed for updates!

And hey, if you enjoyed that FREE excerpt then why not encourage me to do it more often by sending me a tip if you can afford it...

Check out these books from other authors...

Some x-rated recommendations for you

Some naughty tutor–student liaisons for you this month together with some sweet romance to complement the lusty action. And a succubus, of course. What selection of erotica is complete without a sex devil?

Show me the freebies!

If my free offering at the top of this newsletter isn't enough for you, then here are two more...

And here's a collection of reader magnets to dive into! Some familiar titles are joined by some brand new ones!

That's all folks!

Forgive the slim pickings this month. Normal service will hopefully be resumed in October when I should have a new standalone story ready for you that's a little 'high-concept' but I'm finding loads of fun to write!

Until next time... stay kinky x

Erotica writer extraordinaire

THE HORN is on vacation!